He uses pillows to masturbate.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Randomize
