i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
