Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
My hand turned me down
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
