Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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