1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
