Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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