My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
