What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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