It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
