"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I want to make a zoo with you.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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