Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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