Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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