Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
