Kiss
Puke
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
