yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
