The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
