google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
