I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
