found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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