Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
