'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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