I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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