Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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