it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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