4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
