I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
and she was petting her beer can
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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