I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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