ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
