I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
