Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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