things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
