We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
