I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
