its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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