paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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