I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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