____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Farmville is her only friend.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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