this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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