you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
