with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
