Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
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