i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
