Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
