It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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