The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
