and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
