I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
