That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize