your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Randomize
