Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
